What is it that keeps me from writing? If I had to sum it all up in a few words it would be this: my level of writing is not up to par. The good news is, I can use so many more words than just those nine. I can use several paragraphs if I need to, but I don't think I do (at least I hope I don't). When I say that my writing isn't up to par I mean to say that I am one of those people that has fallen into the sad habit of comparing myself to others. When I read books or poems or even blogs that have been written by others, I see them as writers. I can hear the words flow through my mind and they sound so lovely. When I write, however, I feel like I have to stop all too often to make sure things fit together nicely, and it makes all my words bounce around in my head rather than wash through it. It makes me uncomfortable at times.
This isn't to say I dislike the things I write. On the contrary. I enjoy writing and coming up with subjects. I think It's just new to me still (I never was one for reading or writing until my third semester in college: last spring). It's one of those tricky spirals that I have to remove myself from. I have trouble writing because I don't feel comfortable with writing because have trouble writing...and so on. I guess I just need to keep stepping out of my comfort zone and practicing as much as I can. Would you look at that? Two decent paragraphs and I found the problem.
Well then, I'd say you're in good company! (Or maybe I should just be speaking for myself.) I know I compare myself all the time. You're getting better, Corbin! I can tell even in just the last few posts on your blog!!
ReplyDeleteI like this. And I also think the more you write the more comfortable you will feel. I don't necessarily show everyone everything I write, but the act of creating just fills my soul so nicely. And then every so often you find those gems, and that feels even better.
ReplyDeleteI really love this quote: "The more you love your decisions, the less you need others to love them." It's more of a general principle that I try to live by, but I think it applies here too- worrying less about comparing yourself to others, and just loving what you have.
Best of luck! I'm excited to see what you come up with for the blog!
I know what you mean. I only want to write if it is going to flow from fingertip to page. But then I miss out on the opportunity to get better. And you know, I think those writers have to work at it too. I am so glad you started writing and that you have joined this group.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it funny how we're so forgiving to others, and so hard on ourselves? I think that the gap between the ideas that you have in your head and what you are able to write, can be a good thing. It means that we are always pushing ourselves to excel. To dig a little deeper. It keeps complacency at bay. I would imagine none of the great artist ever looked at their work and felt they'd arrived.
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